


Memories

by beargirl1393



Series: Heartache and Love [2]
Category: The Hobbit (2012), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Cheating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-15
Updated: 2013-04-15
Packaged: 2017-12-08 15:17:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 641
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/762874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beargirl1393/pseuds/beargirl1393
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thorin considers how his relationship with Bilbo ended</p>
            </blockquote>





	Memories

_It happened after Bilbo’s ‘betrayal’._

_Thorin had been furious, and more importantly he had been hurt. He saw Bilbo’s actions as a sign that the Hobbit didn’t trust him. No relationship could survive without trust. So, he lost it, his anger at Bilbo’s theft, his betrayal, and his own hurt feelings all combined to make him angry enough to dangle to Hobbit from the tower, although he hadn’t actually gone through with his initial, more than a little insane, plan of tossing the Hobbit off the edge._

_That night, he took his first lover since Bilbo. He had never wanted for lovers, even while in exile or on the quest, so finding someone to replace Bilbo shouldn’t have been difficult._

_It was._

_It was simple to find someone to sate his sexual desires, but it wasn’t the same. He loved Bilbo, and he knew, even at his most deranged he knew, that the Hobbit loved him. He felt no love for his new partners._

_After the battle, sex wasn’t as important as rebuilding Erebor, rebuilding trust with other nations, and trying to find his Hobbit. The first two tasks proved far easier than the third. He eventually learned, some six months after the battle had ended, that Gandalf had taken Bilbo to Rivendale to be healed, as his injuries were potentially life-threatening._

_When Thorin heard that, he had been ready to saddle up and ride to Rivendale to apologize, but Gandalf stopped him. Bilbo was no longer in Rivendale, he informed Thorin. The hobbit had finally recovered sufficiently that the elves allowed him to travel. As of a week ago, Bilbo Baggins was on his way to the Shire and his hobbit hole at Bag End._

_Another six months passed, wherein Thorin handled the necessary affairs involved in reclaiming a city that had been wrecked by a dragon, as well as taking a lover whenever he felt the need for release. He ignored the fact that he would picture the hobbit (his hobbit) during these encounters._

_A year and a half after the battle, Thorin gave up. He left Balin, Fili, and Kili in charge of running the city whilst he set out with the rest of the company to the Shire._

_He counted it as a success when Bilbo didn’t slam the door in his face, although the fear in his eyes haunted Thorin still._

_He apologized, as he had come there to do, and then he begged for another chance to be with Bilbo. The hobbit had forgiven him, and Thorin had been overjoyed. He had never been happier than he was now in the company of his hobbit._

_But some habits are hard to break._

_He continued his pattern of lovers, more discretely and less often than before Bilbo returned. Bilbo would occasionally return home to the Shire, to ensure the Sackville-Bagginses didn’t try to auction his house again. He would only make the trip once every other year, but he would be gone for six months at a time. During that time, Thorin took lovers, ignoring the guilty feeling he got whenever his hobbit looked at him after one of these trips._

_It had been six years, and somehow Bilbo found out._

* * *

 

Thorin sat on the edge of the bed in his chambers, running everything over in his mind. He had lost Bilbo, once again, because he had been an idiot. An unfaithful one at that.

 _Bilbo never cheated on you when he journeyed to the Shire,_ Thorin reproached himself. _He was always faithful to you, even when you turned him away._

The King Under the Mountain buried his head in his hands. He had fucked up, royally, and he wasn’t sure if he could fix it. After all, smith though he is, he has never mended a broken heart, much less one he himself had broken.


End file.
